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Bubblegum-Man #3!!

Sneak peek at the cover. It’s gonna rock, y’all. If you’ve never read my comic before, START HERE!

B-Man 3 Cover

Issue 3 drops September 1. Be ready.

(That’s September. Not August. Just in time for Labor Day. Plus, more time to get Issue 4 up here!)

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News – 6/24/17

Hey, kids. Here are some quick updates to what I’ve been doing.

  • Final (?!) revisions to Emerald Sword are underway. Still rethinking that title. At current pace, my fantasy novel will be ready for agents around July 15 or so.
  • Finished inking/coloring Bubblegum-Man #3 on the big paper. Working on #4 right now. Issue 4 may be a double-sized deluxe-edition. Once these are done, the current story arc will end. In other words, you can expect Bubblegum-Man #3 on this website within the next month or so.
  • Working on Iron Man armor for Dragon-Con. I’ll be down on Sunday this year. I spend most of my time in the dealer room, scavenging comics and coveting rare action figures I cannot afford.
  • Posted two new videos to the Youtubes. Here’s the good one:

I forgot to turn off the air conditioning for that first one, so…yeah.

  • Started watching Rick and Morty this summer. Good stuff!
  • Rebecca Cohen and Ethan Kocak still make better webcomics than me.
  • Someone made a Wheel of Time -themed metal song:

So there’s that.

  • This kid on Youtube wants 5 likes. Let’s help’em out:

Adorable, right?

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MTV Is Slaying It

Tonight’s MTV Movies/TV awards making history by not separating Best Actor into male/female (a designation which seems to have only existed to increase the numbers of awards given, as acting ability has precious little to do with gonads). I don’t see any obscenity here (haven’t been watching long) as in the old days. 

Instead, I see honor and respect and a dedication to the best impulses of the human spirit. A little political with the Best Fight Against the System category. Which is good. Some of the best literature, film, and art are born from political fervor.
Beautiful. Well done, kids. Well done.

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Last Dragon Day – May 8

English literature is awash with great heroes. One of literature’s most venerable heroes is the star of the anonymously-authored Beowulf. This bold Viking set out to save his lord Hrothgar’s people from a vicious monster called Grendel, slew the monster’s mother and her brood of sea serpents.

After these exploits, the author claims that Beowulf participates in the Battle on the Ice of Lake Vanern on the side of Lord Eadgils against the Swedish King Onela.

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Pictured: Real Lake Vanern, Sweden

Beowulf then reigns as King of the Geats for 51 years before a dragon rises to threaten his domain. Taking up his sword and shield once more, great Beowulf set off to challenge the beast. In the end, dragon and hero killed each other.

With the exception of the Lambton Worm and a few other medieval sightings, this was the last Western European dragon. In honor of the beast and the hero, we commemorate May 8 as Last Dragon Day. Why May 8? Well, the Battle on the Ice of Lake Vanern took place around 530 AD. The battle with the dragon took place 51 years later, in 581.

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Pictured: Real dragon (Source: Playbuzz.com)

5/8/1. Technically, Last Dragon Day should start at 1pm. But whatever.

It’s simple to celebrate Last Dragon Day. First, you’ll need a cape. Next, a sword. Preferably one that is obviously fake, so you don’t get shot by any overeager cops, soccer moms, or neighborhood watch people. Finally, you’ll need a place where you can consume vast quantities of sausage, steak, meat pies, breads, and (preferably) dark soda*.

The day starts at 1pm with the consumption of a single, whole jalapeño to taste the fire of the beast and honor the dragon. Revelry begins at night. Gather friends for your warrior band and have yourself a heady night of soda*, song, and merry-making!

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Pictured: Real legendary battle between Beowulf and dragon.

*where appropriate

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Get On Up (2014) – Review

James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. 

“James Brown! James Brown!” –James Brown, 1972


James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. 

James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown.

James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown.

James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown.

James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown. James Brown.

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Enough Talk.

Ok. So by now, you’re either freaking out or wondering why everyone else is. I’m going to lay off the political posts for a while. Instead of complaining and shouting on here, I’m going to start contacting my representatives. I encourage you to do the same, should you feel it necessary.

 

As for this blog, we will go back to talking about fantasy fiction. Superheroes, monsters, and knights. Stuff like that.
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Super Bowl PSA

Hey, folks. Quick reminder that the NFL retains full copyright and trademark privileges for the words “Super Bowl.” So whether referring to your Super Bowl party, planning to attend the Super Bowl, or discussing the results of the Super Bowl after Super Bowl Sunday, please remember to refer to the Super Bowl only as the “Big Game” and not the Super Bowl. 

By law, only the NFL is allowed to call the Super Bowl the “Super Bowl.” I know it’s ridiculous, but sometimes that’s just the way the super bowls.

Go Falcons! Here’s hoping you manage to defeat the Pats during the Super Bowl to win Sunday’s Super Bowl on Super Bowl Sunday!!


No matter who you’re rooting for, please be safe on Super Bowl Sunday while watching the Super Bowl. Be safe getting home after the Super Bowl is over. And never, ever call the Super Bowl the “Super Bowl.”

Happy Super Bowl Sunday!

Super Bowl.

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How to Survive as an Autistic Adult in America

Lots of HFA/Aspie/autistic adults such as myself may find it difficult to do even the simplest of non-disabled tasks. Tasks such as driving a car, moving out of your parents’ house, or even finding someone cute who likes you back can be monumental hurdles for adults with disabilities, especially if those disabilities are primarily mental, such as with autism.

Luckily, I’ve come up with this 5 step guide to help you, as an American with autism, survive in today’s world.

Step 1: Be a Techie

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If you have autism, you need to love computers. I don’t just mean video games. You need to love coding, assembling microchips, providing IT support, and all that good stuff. If you are more artistically-minded or if you don’t live anywhere close to Silicon Valley, stop doing that immediately. People with autism are not allowed to be artists, unless they are already well-off with a lot of established connections. The arts — especially the world of publishing, comics, and literature — is no place for a low-to-middle class person with autism and no connections. You need to be a techie, no matter how much you hate it or how little talent/motivation you have for it.

Step 2: Be Grateful

As a disabled adult, your primary purpose is to give non-disabled people inspiration. You’re supposed to help other people realize that they have the inner strength necessary to overcome life’s problems. Your own problems don’t matter. No  matter how bad your life is, remember that you don’t get to complain ever. Complaining, like job satisfaction, is for those of sound mind and body only. So be grateful for everything you have, even if everything you have would reduce a non-disabled person to a quivering  mass of horror and panic were your situations reversed.

Step 3: Accept All Advice

People are going to be giving you advice. No matter how terrible it is, you have to take it. If you don’t, you are Ungrateful. And there is nothing worse for a disabled person to be than Ungrateful. Remember, techniques that people without disabilities say work will work for you, even if you’ve already tried them to no avail 14,000 times. Clearly, you are not trying hard enough or you just aren’t doing it right. Try their advice again and again. But remember, even if you do go quite mad from all this effort, you are not allowed to complain or even to politely decline anyone’s advice. Unless that advice comes from someone else with a mental or physical disability. Their experience doesn’t count.

Step 4: Remember that Your Opinions, Feelings, and Interests Do Not Matter

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All that matters in this world is what other people tell you matters. Your own opinions or feelings don’t come into it. Remember, your emotions, no matter how uncontrollable they may seem, are your own fault. If you feel a constant sense of dread that lasts for hours, days, weeks, or even months, it is entirely your fault because you are clearly too weak. You need to be stronger. Pray more, accept more advice, keep doing what other people tell you to do, even if it doesn’t make any sense. You don’t have a right to an explanation, a sense of peace or serenity, or a life filled with anything more than constant drudgery punctuated by joy. You don’t have any rights at all.

Step 5: It’s All Up to You

In the end, the only person who can help you succeed is you. If you’re not able to make the right connections or find the best jobs or if you blow an interview because you get manipulated into mentioning the fact that you do not drive, it’s your fault. You need to do better and try harder next time. It’s your responsibility to keep emailing contacts, even if you’re pretty sure at this point you’re just harassing them. Think outside the box, unless the advice-givers tell you not to.

It’s up to you to go and get that career/relationship/life other people think it’s within your ability to get. And if you can’t rise to their expectations, let alone your own, it is because you are weak. Remember, there are lots of famous people from history that we think may have probably didn’t have autism. So if you’re not at least as successful as them, it’s entirely your fault.

Step 6: Think Positive

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While these steps may seem impossible, as you slowly allow yourself to go insane, you will begin to realize just how small we all are on this pathetic planet. You will realize that you are indeed the Lizard King and can do anything. As you tear through the veil separating this world from the next, rejoice and sing a song of fire and blood that brings this world to its knees. Remember, anything is possible!

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